OCTOBER 28, 2026 FATHER PETER JAE CHOI
I started to journal about 5 years ago. Even though I don’t write everyday, my journal captures all the ups and downs of my life. When I feel sad or upset, or feel worried or anxious, I sit before the Blessed Sacrament and write my journal. When I feel joyful and thankful I write those things in my journal, too. As I re-read my journal from time to time, I realized that I am getting better at accepting disappointments life brings and I am learning to trust God more and more. I also learned that when I am faced with obstacles and challenges in life, I have a tendency to feel helpless and overwhelmed. This is a trait that people who suffered from early childhood trauma often experience. I realized that I’ve gotten a lot better at handling them as well. I realized all my challenges eventually got resolved, every single time. It didn’t always meet my expectations, the deadlines I imposed, or the way I wanted them to be resolved. When I looked back I realized that God’s always been in charge. I think being a disciple of Christ isn’t really about seeking perfection, but having the willingness to grow, which always demands change.
In today’s gospel, after spending the entire night in prayer, Jesus called 12 disciples. Choosing to follow Jesus meant that they had to leave behind their professions, their family and home, and their possessions and worldly comforts. But even when we follow Jesus, old habits die hard. As they were following Jesus, they had not parted ways with their worldly ambitions. I am sure we remember James and John asking to be seated at the right hand of the Father in God’s Kingdom, place of honour and glory. Jesus taught them true greatness comes from serving others, rather than seeking power. The mission of Christ is meant to put us at the service of each other and work together.
During the FIFA World Cup, in the quarter final match Norway was winning one-nothing against England. Towards the very end of the first half, a Norwegian player Alexander Sorloth had the ball with two defenders surrounding him, while his teammate Ering Haaland wide open. If he had just passed the ball to his teammate, Haaland would have scored an easy goal. But Alexander struggled to score a goal for himself, and failed. That mistake was costly! Norway lost to England 2 to 1, during overtime. The point I am trying to make is, sometimes we forget we are on the same team. When one scores then the entire team wins. There is nothing more counterproductive than competing against each other when we are on the same team. We are called to see the big picture that is the one mission of Christ and become united in the mission. The only reason we will be victorious is not because of what we have done, but because of what Christ has done!
St. Simon and St. Jude were under the shadow of more prominent saints like Peter, Andrew, James and John. Those four inner-circle disciples were invited to places when others were not. When Jesus was talking with them, the other disciples were made to look like mere observers, supporting actors at best, if not extras on the movie set. How unflattering to be described as, Jude as “not Judas Iscariot,” and Simon as “not Simon Peter,” and being forgotten for many centuries because of the mix up. Just because we don’t know much about what St. Simon and St. Jude doesn’t mean God doesn’t know. St. Simon and St. Jude, and many others who are in heaven that we know nothing about, faithfully carried out the mission that was important for God, while not drawing attention to themselves or caring about recognition.
I heard a story about a former Under Secretary of Defense who gave a speech at a large conference. He took his place on the stage and took a pause and took a sip of coffee from the Styrofoam cup. Then he took another sip and looked down at the cup and smiled. Then began his speech, “You know, I spoke here last year. I presented at this same conference on this same stage. But last year, I was still the Under Secretary. I flew here in business class. When I landed, there was someone waiting for me at the airport to take me to my hotel. When I arrived at my hotel, there was someone else waiting for me. They had already checked me into the hotel, handed me my key and carried my bag up to my room. The next morning, there was someone waiting for me in the lobby who drove me to this same venue. I was taken through a back entrance, shown to the greenroom and handed a cup of coffee in a beautiful ceramic cup.”
“But this year, as I stand here to speak to you, I am no longer the Under Secretary, I flew here in economy class. There was no one waiting for me at the airport. I took a taxi to the hotel, carried my own bag to my room. This morning, I took a taxi to come here. When I asked someone in the back stage if there was any coffee, he pointed to a coffee machine. So I walked over and poured myself a cup of coffee into this Styrofoam cup.” Then, by raising the styrofoam cup, he continued, “it occurred to me, the ceramic cup they gave me last year was never meant for me at all. It was meant for the position I held. I deserve a Styrofoam cup. All the perks, all the benefits and advantages you may get for the rank or position you hold, they aren’t meant for you. They are meant for the role you fill. It’s not permanent. One day you will be replaced and the world will move on, and one day you will no longer be holding a ceramic cup in your hand, but a styrofoam cup.”
Let’s remember the lesson from the styrofoam cup. The world will love you for what you can do, and not for who you are. But God loves you for who you are. Even though what we do for God’s kingdom may go unnoticed here on earth, what we do for the kingdom of God will be forever remembered and celebrated in God’s heavenly Kingdom.
